April 8, 1947, Dr. Alfred Kinsey founded the Kinsey Institute. Giving researchers the freedom to study sex, improving relationships all over the world. In the process, he began to transform our understanding of sex and sexual behavior.
Kinsey was raised in a highly religious home, passionate about the outdoors and the natural world. While in college he would study botany and zoology (while his parents wanted him to become an engineer). He would lay down the foundation for the emerging study of plants and animals in the single field of biology, thus giving scientist the ability to promote evolution.
There is no doubt that it was the Kinsey Institute that changed the perception of sex on a global platform. The institute was originally named the Institute for Sex Research, founded at the Indiana University using grants from the Rockefeller Foundation.
The landmark document, Sexual Behavior in the Human Male would be published just one year later. Researchers found that 37% of men and 13% of women had same-sex-experiences that brought them to orgasm. At the same time, they published statistics (still-cited) that 10% of men are exclusively homosexual. It would be at this point the "Kinsey Scale" was established, a six-point method to indicate gendering of a person's attraction.
The work was not without controversy or questionable methods, Kinsey encouraged sex between colleagues and he had several relationships (sexual) with work colleagues as well. One example was that he would film fellow researchers having sex. Some of the data he collected is considered inaccurate, for example on single pedophile was extrapolated to represent multiple people. Kinsey has been accused of disproportionately focusing on queer men and prisoners, without fully understanding the culture that represented each one. At one point Kinsey began to import erotic material from other countries, thus gaining the attention of the U.S. Government, and the U.S. Customs would have to sue to release pornographic material.
Kinsey passed away in 1956 and Dr. Paul Gebhard took over the institute, and successfully fought off government restrictions over the word that the institute conducted. Dr. June Reinisch took over the helm and at this time began to publish newspaper columns that discussed topics in sexual research.
Today the institute has continued to move forward the discussion about sex. There are now online resources to help people understand their bodies and desires. How far has the Kinsey Institute come? Well, there is now a sexual health clinic and exhibits erotic art shows which allow research into the humanities.
For 71 years the Kinsey Institute has changed our perception regarding sex and sexual behavior. While there have been some questionable research and conclusions, there is no doubt the Institute has allowed human around the world to have an open discussion. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
If you remember 'The Mummy" and "George of the Jungle, then you might remember Brendan Fraser. The actor seemed to just disappear, well now he is opening up about why he left.
In a bombshell interview with GQ, the actor states that the main reason his career went south is because of an alleged sexual assault involving Philip Berk, the former president of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, the same organization that host the Golden Globes.
The incident supposedly happened in 2003 at an industry luncheon. Fraser can recall the incident with clarity. “His left-hand reaches around grabs my ass cheek, and one of his fingers touches me in the taint. And he starts moving it around,” he says. “I felt ill. I felt like a little kid. I felt like there was a ball in my throat. I thought I was going to cry.” It appears that Berk later apologized, however, the actor was so upset regarding the incident that he decided to retreat from the spotlight. “It made me feel reclusive,” he also stated that “I became depressed. I was blaming myself and I was miserable–because I was saying, ‘This is nothing; this guy reached around and he copped a feel.’
It was the #MeToo and Time's up movements that gave him the insight and courage to speak out about his experience. “I watched this wonderful [Time’s Up] movement, these people with the courage to say what I didn’t have the courage to say,” he says. “Am I still frightened? Absolutely. Do I feel like I need to say something? Absolutely. Have I wanted to many, many times? Absolutely. Have I stopped myself? Absolutely.” “And maybe I am over-reacting in terms of what the instance was. I just know what my truth is.”
Of course, Berk denies the allegations, stating that “Mr. Fraser’s version is a total fabrication. My apology admitted no wrongdoing, the usual ‘If I’ve done anything that upset Mr. Fraser, it was it was not intended and I apologize.’” In a statement to Us Weekly, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association stated:
The HFPA stands firmly against sexual harassment and the type of behavior described in this article. Over the years we’ve continued a positive working relationship with Brendan, which includes announcing Golden Globe nominees, attending the ceremony and participating in press conferences. This report includes alleged information that the HFPA was previously unaware of and at this time we are investigating further details surrounding the incident.
Rickey Martin wants to have an open conversation about open relationships, especially with gay men. He is currently playing Antonio D'Amico the longtime lover of Gianni Versace on he Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story. The two were in a 15 year committed relationship, however, they were open and did sleep with other people. Martin wants the series to dispel the stereotypes about non-monogamous relationships.
Martin told Vulture “I want to normalize relationships like this,” and “It’s good for the world; it’s good for me as a gay man with kids. It’s important that we shed some light on power couples like this.”
What he found most challenging as an actor was in the first episode, when the FBI began it's interrogating D'Amico about his relationship with Varsace. “It was a very excruciating scene for me. I mean, this guy was opening every door that was a secret from Gianni’s and Antonio’s relationship. I’m talking about bringing men into our lives. I’m talking about bringing escorts. That exposure is very heavy,” Martin said. “[But] the story, once again, needs to be told, for people to see the level of unity between these two. The level of commitment after 15 years. The level of security… and trust between them is so solid.”
What I Mean When I Say Toxic Non-Monogamy Culture.This piece is in response to a short list of aspects of monogamous relationships that can be toxic (link is dead, I will try to find it again). Some of these are mirrors of the points in the list of toxic monogamy cultural norms, and some of them are very different. All of this is in my opinion, and probably has a philosophically anarchistic slant to them. They are accompanied by commentary on why the idea in question is toxic. Enjoy.
What I Mean When I Say Toxic Non-Monogamy Culture
~Jealousy is an indicator of the wrong-doing of the partner of the person feeling jealous.
Jealousy is a word often used in non-monogamous discourse as a weapon. It is accusatory, as well as it is shamed. I think jealousy can be a catch-all term for bad feelings we have related to the other relationships close people to us are in, and starts within ourselves as a marker for things we need to think about regarding our personal development and that of our relationship integrity.
~A sufficiently intense love is enough to overcome any practical disagreements over needs, insecurities or other relationships
This is a fallacy. Sometimes, people are incompatible and that just becomes more and more likely the more people are added to the equation. Unless everyone has their shit together, it’s not going to function in a way that supports everyone involved, let alone manage to squeak by without anyone getting really steamrolled.
~Relationships are for getting your needs met, so if you aren’t getting a need met in one relationship, another with whomever will do
People are not need-fulfillment pegs to shove into the holes in your heart, y’all. Trying to find people with your specific “need” (let’s face it, we’re talking about wants) in mind first is not paying homage to the dynamism of human beings.
~Love is limitless, which means that you can have as many relationships as you want
Time is limited, and so is energy. While it is prudent, always, to consider whether the amount of time you have to offer someone lines up with the amount that they would like to have with you, it is also advisable to take a look at the assumption that time spent in each other’s physical company is the be-all-end-all demonstration of care.
~Commitment assumes exclusivity of aspects of relationships
Commitment is in the agreements, not the exclusivity. It is also a bit of a fallacy, as people’s minds can change about what they want to be doing, and then weigh the value of the relationship agreement against the desired change at any time, and it serves us to foster safe renegotiation in order to promote autonomy in our relationships.
~Marriage and children limit how non-monogamous someone is, or what they have available to other people
While children become a top priority in the lives of parents, this does not negate or cancel out the importance of their relationships to them, and how they engage with the people they care about. It can mean some finagling of schedules, but that can be easily managed when everyone is understanding and accepting of children’s needs being of high importance.
~Your insecurities are your partner’s responsibility to tip-toe around and never your responsibility to work on
This is precisely in conflict with why lots of people choose non-monogamy for their lives: the challenge, the growth, and the stretching capacity of their hearts and minds. Without a careful examination of self-motives and self-governance, non-monogamous relationships will crash and burn more often than not. Ignorance of self-work is a disservice to yourself, and to the people you care about. Asking for help with self-work is great, but it is still ultimately your responsibility.
~Your value to a partner is directly proportional to the amount of time and energy they spend on you, and it is in zero-sum competition with everything else they value in life
As previously mentioned, it is also advisable to take a look at the assumption that time spent in each other’s physical company is the be-all-end-all demonstration of care. This is simply not always true, and can be a showstopper if an inherent need for time, or lack thereof, is mismatched. There are lots of different ways to show care, but they need to be negotiated and desirable for all parties involved.
~Being of value to a partner should always make up a large chunk of how you value yourself
This one has been a trip-wire for me for years, and I am happy to say that I may finally be getting out of some very self-destructive habits around how much my friends and partners experience of me shapes my reality about who I am. While constructively critical feedback from loved ones is a help to anyone’s personal growth, boundaries around how another person defines your behavior, and how your inherent character can be separate from their perceptions of your behavior, is so important for self-sustainability.
Original post: Chelsey Does Love. 04/14/2017
The best sex in my opinion is sex that pushes our boundaries and makes us anxious. If not, sex just becomes consistent and safe, that equates to boring and limited sex. Experts state that pushing yourself into sex that makes you anxious is not only a sign of growth, but a direct move towards hotter orgasms. As humans we tend to focus on touching the body, and thus ignoring the high arousal of the verbal. I understand that there are those who are not fully into "dirty talk", but a little verbal reinforcement can go a long way in being sexual stimulated. For example dirty talk should be confined to the bedroom, sex can exist anywhere with sexting; furthermore sexting has become one of the best forms of arousal and eroticization.
Sex is about assessing compatibility and opening yourself and partners to what arouses us, and if both are an erotic match. Remembering that what you want sexually is not always possible, and relationships have limits
There is no way that anyone can make someone into a sexual being that they're not, but it's how we respond to a partner that is making a sexual request and especially when it comes down to a deep communication of care. So when asking your partner to talk dirty to you is not just about wanting some filth talk so that you can "get off". It becomes a request to be a good partner and learning how important you and sex are together. If you trust your partner, and you feel comfortable and safe with - asks for sex that tests or is outside of your boundaries, ALLWAYS DO IT!
Just keep in mind that if you want your partner to talk dirty to you, you have to ask for it, no one can read minds. Keep in mind that is you're going to ask something uncommon from someone, be prepared to show them as well. So next time you want some dirty talk make sure you establish boundaries as to what words are acceptable and what words are not. And it’s a bonus if your partner is more on the top or dom side of the sexual continuum, I've learned to test the waters and know that not everyone has the temperament, interest or sexual ability to give me the filth talk, and that's OK!
Tegan Zayne a adult gay porn star accused Topher DiMaddio of rape this past Sunday via a lengthily Twitter post. He stated the reason for his post was to address a serious issue in the gay adult industry that is often ignored.
In his post Zayne relays a story that revolves around a scene both actors filmed for CockyBoys two years ago. Zayne claims that DiMaggio strongly pressured him to have sex the night before the scene was filmed. Zayne stated “belittled and degraded” by the experience and was “told how I’m such a girl.” Further more he's seen a lot of stories come out about the #metoo thing,” and “but it’s (sic) feels like no one cares about the male victims, or the sex workers. As someone else said “rape doesn’t exist in this line of work”, and it couldn’t be more true.”
DiMaggio denies the event ever occurred and stated to QueerMeNow (don't look up this link at work) “He’s crazy and twists stories. He was so happy to film with me even the next day. It’s sad. I’m not going to give it any attention.” CockyBoys released a statement "Tegan Zayne did not tell them about the alleged rape the day after, and his post today is the first time they’ve heard the allegation.”
Tegan Zanye did post a tweet that mentioned the rape, but he just released a detailed acocunt this past Sunday.
HERE IS THE COCKY BOY SCENE THEY FILMED
In a recent interview with Gay Star News, professional wrestler Mike Parrow talked about dealing with being gay and living in a "closet". This was his first time speaking openly about his sexuality along with the long journey on accepting himself.
Four years ago the Orlando native would let close friends and family four years ago; but admits that he tired to fight his same-sex feelings by dating women. Something he regrets as he got older it would be hard to have any type of emotional relationship with women and therefore would end it by stating "I just don't think you're pretty." Something he wishes he could take back.
Moving to Orlando in his late 20's he stated that it was "absolutely the worst experience in my life." Believing it would be the perfect time to explore his sexuality. He learned that gay men could be the meanest, cruelest people you've ever met and that you can be masculine-shamed in the gay community in which he added "weird, but it happens." It would drive him to contemplate suicide and even sign up for conversion therapy, in which he describes as an "absolute joke."
Coming out to his family he admits was the hardest thing he every had to do, but understanding if he was going to be true to himself and to be himself he had to. His mother a Sunday school teacher summed it up perfectly " God doesn't make mistakes."
‘I told my dad and he was like, “Yeah?” And I’m like, “Yeah?” And he was like, “Well, you’ve got to give me some credit. I am a detective. I kind of figured that out of all the girls you kept denying that you didn’t like girls, I was just waiting for you to tell me!” Mike Parrow
With regards to his wrestling career it appears that he has not run into much homophobia, and when he does he address it ‘When I personally hear those things I address it. So, I will go up to them and say, “If you have a problem, we can discuss this.” he stated.
It appears that more professional athletes come out as gay and breaking down stereotypes and barriers. It shows the progress of the LGBT community. However, even we have to admit we have a long way to go to accepting people who they are and the choices they make in their lives.
What are your thoughts?
In a recent study researches found that gay couples appear to be happier in their relationships than straight couples, and in another study found gays are better at sex.
Indiana University reached out to more than 2,000 gay's (gay, lesbian and bisexuals) and 50,000 straight individuals. The study was conducted across the United States. And the results are pretty surprising
What was interesting wast that gay men reported that they have had an orgasm 89% during sex, lesbians 86%. Straight men reported to have orgasm-ed 95% of the time, and straight women only 65% of the time. So let just assume that straight couples both climax 65% of the time, well then we can assume that gay and lesbian partners are doing really good when it come to sex. look at it this way gay couples come out 24 and 21 percent ahead of straight couples, which show you that gay couples appear to have more fun during sex.
Do you know what I did to the last guy that called me Tinkerbelle. Slept with him? Dani Alexander
However the report did show that bisexual men have orgasms 88% of the time during sex, bi women were not so fortunate at 66% of the time reach an orgasm. Research has found that bisexuals consistently have the lowest life satisfactions among LGBT people.
So, it appears that gay men lead the pack when it come to satisfaction, but lets me honest it's not always the case. But gay men tend to be more primeval and physical, this might explain whey gay men enjoy engaging in sex. Lesbians tend to be more passionate and there is a strong emotional bond. Either way the study shows there is no denying gay couples enjoy sex much more than straight couples. YEAH!
What do you think?
Three porn actors two men, and one female have claimed in a Federal law suit that they contracted HIV in 2014 while filming scenes for Kink. U.S. District Judge Dames Donato granted the insurance company a summary judgment saying a physical-sexual abuse exclusion "exempts the insurer from covering claims arising from sexual activity," according to a report in the Courthouse News. The three actors are being represented by Atain Specialty Insurance.
According to one of the actors now retired stated he was infected while filming "Bound in Public" in 2013. Another performer claims that while filming at the Armony in San Francisco, he was blindfolded and required to perform oral sex with dozens of men of the general public - "they were untested, unidentified members of the general public." He tested positive two week later. However does admit he had a cut in his mouth at the time of filming.
“The language of this exclusion is not ambiguous in the context of this policy and the circumstances of this case,” Donato wrote in his 6-page ruling. “Because the contractual language is clear and explicit, it governs.”
In a statement to Courthouse News Karen Tynan attorney for Kink.com in 2015 “None of these claims were made at the time of the shoots, and are easily refuted both by detailed shoot records, our testing protocols, and the video footage itself."
I am sure there are many points of view regarding "bareback", "risky" porn. What are your thoughts?
h/t: Courthouse News
Have you ever thought about kink, and what would it be like. Well lets just say you might be in for a surprise. Researcher Katharine Gates looked into the world of kink, this vast sometime unknown scene of desire. Her new book "Deviant Desires: A Tour of the Erotic Edge" she explores the vast world of kink and ties them all together in a chart. How they are somewhat interchanged with each other, some are just downright predatory and in some cases criminal.
Gabriel H. Sanchez interviewed Katherine Gates for BuzzFeed. This is the complete article "10 Sex Kinks That Prove There's No One Way To Do It".
What do you Think?