If you believe that men can't be raped, well let me say that that your life has been a lie. In our culture every gender is assigned a certain stereotype, and in the LGBT community it's either masculine or feminine and how easy is it to just say men can't be raped. Or if you were rapped to be labeled by a community that is suppose to be there for you?
"Project Unbreakable" a website started in 2011 by Grace Brown, a New York photography student to raise awareness about sexual assault by allowing those who have been victims to use it and tell their story. Survivors hold up posters with quotes from their attackers, and not surprising their are a number of men who volunteered to be a part of the project. Most of the men featured have either been the victims of sexual assault, child abuse, and domestic violence.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), lesbian, gay and bisexual people experience sexual violence at similar or higher rates than heterosexuals. The National Coalition of Anti-Violence Projects (NCAVP) estimates that nearly one in ten LGBTQ survivors of intimate partner violence (IPV) has experienced sexual assault from those partners. Studies suggest that around half of transgender people and bisexual women will experience sexual violence at some point in their lifetime.
HERE'S THEIR VOICE
Images are from the Tumbler page of "Project Unbreakable"
Something to think about: it appears that more people cheat in their relationship than we thought. According to a new survey, statistic found that 52% of gay men in monogamous relationships have cheated on their partners (boyfriends), and 45% confess that their partners never found out.
The study was conducted with nearly 1000 gay and/or bisexuals and conducted by FS magazine.
52% of the cheaters, 17% they had contracted an STI while fooling around, and 61% never told their partners, OUCH! The number of gay men who have been cheated on is even higher, 58% say a partner had been unfaithful.
Of the 52% of cheaters, 17% said they had picked up an STI while sneaking around–and 61% say they never told their partners about it.
These high numbers aren’t just limited to monogamous relationships. 40% in open relationships responded that their partners had violated or broken the rules set by the couple.
“17% of the gay men who admitted to cheating on their partner got an STI or HIV,” he says. “We recommend that all sexually active gay men, whether in a relationship or not, get tested for HIV and STI at least twice a year.” According to Ian Howley, Chief Executive of the Health Equality and Rights Organization.
So, if we’re going, to be honest, we must acknowledge that monogamy isn’t for everyone. All relationships must have direct and effective communication; you can’t be afraid to talk to your partner and always being honest with yourself.
While at the Adult Entertainment Expo, Men's Health had the opportunity to speak to several porn start to better understand the pressures within the industry; especially staying thin and the workout routines they use.
Derrick Peirce and Ryan Driller say that guys in straight porn at first didn't really have to deal with being to fit, but over the past decade, it has become a strict requirement. “The face of adult in general has changed,” said Pierce. “For the guys, soft bodies have gone by the wayside.”
“Now that the industry is more focused on aesthetics, you’ve got guys coming in who are more built,” added Driller, who famously got buff to play Superman in a series of porn parodies. “Women are watching more porn, and they would rather see a guy who’s a little more appealing than a slobby guy who’s sitting on the couch all day long… who doesn’t have his belly hanging over the girl.”
It is no secret that gay men in the industry have higher expectations placed on them then their straight counterparts when it comes to being muscular. And, the porn industry is no different. Driller, who has done gay porn, says that gay models must be as muscular as possible to survive in the industry. “There’s more pressure on the gay side to be super fit,” says Driller, who has shot both gay and straight porn. “But in general, there’s more pressure in the gay community to be super-fit.”
Gay adult star Wesley Wood agreed, and said that he came into the business feeling the need to workout more and be more muscular. “My first year in the industry, I was trying to look a certain way and I was chasing a goal that wasn’t attainable,” he says. “I’ve gotten really comfortable and happy with myself.”
“On the straight side, it’s not really about [the male performer], it’s about the woman,” Woods added, “For gay porn, its two men, so it’s obviously different. And our culture requires men to look fit and put together.”
Almost all adult entertainers have too keep up with consistent exercise routines.
Wood stated that he maintains a strict diet, lefts weights four days a week, and will hikes the Runyon Canyons six days a week. Driller also hikes the canyons six days a week. “I have a lift routine where it’s chest one day, triceps one day, legs one day, shoulders one day, biceps one day,” he says. “But I don’t lift 6 days a week. I usually run and lift 2 days, then swim one day, then repeat.”
Straight porn star Aaron Thompson shared his workout routine. “I work out every single day for at least an hour,” says Thompson. “I don’t do a ton of heavy machine ‘gym guy lifting, but focus more on stamina and basic core fitness stuff — running, pull-ups, sit-ups, squats. Stuff you can do from a hotel room, truck stop or in prison, ya know?”
“If I film a scene, that’s about 45 min of cardio,” says Thompson, “If it’s not too late I’ll go to the gym after and do strength training since I ‘banged’ out cardio already.”
There is no doubt that men in the adult industry have to stay tight and muscular in order to keep their job. Woods stated that most of the these men have found a balance between work obligation and personal peace.
Tegan Zayne a adult gay porn star accused Topher DiMaddio of rape this past Sunday via a lengthily Twitter post. He stated the reason for his post was to address a serious issue in the gay adult industry that is often ignored.
In his post Zayne relays a story that revolves around a scene both actors filmed for CockyBoys two years ago. Zayne claims that DiMaggio strongly pressured him to have sex the night before the scene was filmed. Zayne stated “belittled and degraded” by the experience and was “told how I’m such a girl.” Further more he's seen a lot of stories come out about the #metoo thing,” and “but it’s (sic) feels like no one cares about the male victims, or the sex workers. As someone else said “rape doesn’t exist in this line of work”, and it couldn’t be more true.”
DiMaggio denies the event ever occurred and stated to QueerMeNow (don't look up this link at work) “He’s crazy and twists stories. He was so happy to film with me even the next day. It’s sad. I’m not going to give it any attention.” CockyBoys released a statement "Tegan Zayne did not tell them about the alleged rape the day after, and his post today is the first time they’ve heard the allegation.”
Tegan Zanye did post a tweet that mentioned the rape, but he just released a detailed acocunt this past Sunday.
HERE IS THE COCKY BOY SCENE THEY FILMED
Anal bleaching, that's out! Gay men in Thailand are starting a new trend for their nether regions, and getting their penises whitened. Lelux Hospital in Bangkok has reported that almost 100 men have had treatment, mostly identify as LGBT.
The hospital has been known for their body-whitening services and only began to offer this unique service after a customer requested to have his package lighted, after complaining of "dark parts."
Manager Bunthita Wattanasiri told AFT that a lot of people are asking about the procedure and most clients are between 22 and 55-years old and are willing to pay about $650 for five sessions. The procedure uses a tiny laser to whiten the area. "We have to be careful because it's a sensitive part of the body and can be quite painful at times," Wattanasiri said.
After the release of a man undergoing the procedure it started to get an excess of attention. While skin-whiting services are available worldwide, Channel NewAsia has reported that it's very popular in Thailand.
So would you have this done?
In a recent study researches found that gay couples appear to be happier in their relationships than straight couples, and in another study found gays are better at sex.
Indiana University reached out to more than 2,000 gay's (gay, lesbian and bisexuals) and 50,000 straight individuals. The study was conducted across the United States. And the results are pretty surprising
What was interesting wast that gay men reported that they have had an orgasm 89% during sex, lesbians 86%. Straight men reported to have orgasm-ed 95% of the time, and straight women only 65% of the time. So let just assume that straight couples both climax 65% of the time, well then we can assume that gay and lesbian partners are doing really good when it come to sex. look at it this way gay couples come out 24 and 21 percent ahead of straight couples, which show you that gay couples appear to have more fun during sex.
Do you know what I did to the last guy that called me Tinkerbelle. Slept with him? Dani Alexander
However the report did show that bisexual men have orgasms 88% of the time during sex, bi women were not so fortunate at 66% of the time reach an orgasm. Research has found that bisexuals consistently have the lowest life satisfactions among LGBT people.
So, it appears that gay men lead the pack when it come to satisfaction, but lets me honest it's not always the case. But gay men tend to be more primeval and physical, this might explain whey gay men enjoy engaging in sex. Lesbians tend to be more passionate and there is a strong emotional bond. Either way the study shows there is no denying gay couples enjoy sex much more than straight couples. YEAH!
What do you think?
Three porn actors two men, and one female have claimed in a Federal law suit that they contracted HIV in 2014 while filming scenes for Kink. U.S. District Judge Dames Donato granted the insurance company a summary judgment saying a physical-sexual abuse exclusion "exempts the insurer from covering claims arising from sexual activity," according to a report in the Courthouse News. The three actors are being represented by Atain Specialty Insurance.
According to one of the actors now retired stated he was infected while filming "Bound in Public" in 2013. Another performer claims that while filming at the Armony in San Francisco, he was blindfolded and required to perform oral sex with dozens of men of the general public - "they were untested, unidentified members of the general public." He tested positive two week later. However does admit he had a cut in his mouth at the time of filming.
“The language of this exclusion is not ambiguous in the context of this policy and the circumstances of this case,” Donato wrote in his 6-page ruling. “Because the contractual language is clear and explicit, it governs.”
In a statement to Courthouse News Karen Tynan attorney for Kink.com in 2015 “None of these claims were made at the time of the shoots, and are easily refuted both by detailed shoot records, our testing protocols, and the video footage itself."
I am sure there are many points of view regarding "bareback", "risky" porn. What are your thoughts?
h/t: Courthouse News
A news study of more than 25,000 people in the United Kingdom and 9,000 in Australia conducted by Janeen Baxter and Francisco Perales of the University of Queensland found that same-sex couples are indubitably happier than their straight counter parts. However the study showed that bisexuals are less happier in relationships.
It was suggested that same-sex couples might have stronger bonds because they're less intent on sticking to tried-and-true gender roles. “Individuals in same-sex couples (particularly lesbian women) generally are more equitable in the ways in which they allocate domestic work, including childcare.” While straight couples tend to always want to reaffirm gender roles, which can lead to a destructive power dynamic.
Relationship quality in same-sex couples was as high as in heterosexual couples in the United Kingdom,” they conclude, “and higher in Australia.
The research showed to some extent that gay couples sometimes or more than likely feel aligned with the LGBT community or like-minded couples. This might explain their happiness: “Individuals in same-sex relationships may be more likely than those in different-sex relationships to have high relationship investment….This study shows a strong support for the changing of laws and policies to legalize adoption and parenting rights for same-sex couples. At the same time the study shows a strong need to pay attention to bisexual individuals since their outcomes are comparatively poor.
WHAT DO YOU THINK? IN YOUR EXPERIENCE ARE GAY COUPLES HAPPIER?
If we're going to be honest I had never heard of Colby Melvin. It's impossible to follow everyone in the LGBT culture and to me he was just another pretty face. But I took the time to read the article published by Queerty. The article talks about his coming out in conservative Alabama, the pressures of modeling, being a young gay man, HIV testing, and some other interesting topics.
When I first came out I was scared to get tested. I hadn’t really received much education on how to take care of myself. Over the years I’ve learned and become much more comfortable talking with my doctor and regularly getting checked. Colby Melvin
Regardless if you're a fan of following young gay men or not. I found this article to very open and interesting. We tend to forget that while they have amazing bodies, they are for all intents and purposes people.
Image purchased from istockphoto.com and used for commercial use only.
There is no doubt that seniors in the LGBT community are isolated or discriminated. How may times have I heard men at a bar or event say "he's so old", "that man is a creep", "I would never dare be with someone that old", or even worse "he should be dead by now", "He props the bar up." No matter what is said there is this level of disrespect for seniors in the LGBT community. I've heard this 100's of time how this community is suppose to be inclusive, love one another, be there for each other, etc... And as I always say "this community is full of bullshit".
To assume that when someone reaches a certain age their no longer valuable to the community. Maybe the younger generation doesn't care to remember the past. The struggles that many in the senior community had to fight for or sacrifice. We as a community owe it to them to make sure they are taking care of, accepted, and loved. I mean when did you decide to just throw someone away because they have reached a certain age?
I came across an article Address Discrimination in Healthcare Against LGBT Elders from Within the Community, by Robert Vestees. It's an in depth look at the stigmatization LGBT seniors face in healthcare. But it's more than just health care issues that need to be addressed within the community. We have to take a hard look at care-giving issues, financial insecurity, social isolation and access to aging services.
To discard the legacy and history of LGBT seniors would be a disaster to our community. There has to be a proactive move to include senior's in our daily lives. To prove that we are more than the sum of who we are, and that we as a community take care of our own. That regardless of our age we belong, and we have value.
New Orleans is fortunate to have an organization to assist LGBT seniors. For more information contact New Orleans Advocates for LGBT Elders at noagenola.org or call (504) 517-2345.
Image purchased through istock.com and used for commercial use only.