Written By: Nick R. – Personal Opinion
“Coming out” has different meanings to many people, and for some not coming out at all is their preference. I am one of those people, and I don’t have an issue with not coming out. The only people who know about my homosexuality are my parents, some family and really close friends (let’s not forget the men I’ve hook-up with).
I choose to live in the “closet” for personal reasons and no I’m not ashamed of being gay. Not in the least. I’ve decided that I prefer not coming out to the public, and to be honest it’s my business.
I came out to my parents when I was 24 and about to move to New Orleans. While my parents took the news ok, it would take my dad several years to accept my sexuality. Growing up in a small conservative town did shape my perspective on life and one’s sexuality. I wouldn’t have my first sexual encounter with a man until I at the University of Louisiana at Lafayette, I was 19. I had no idea what to do, so my first experience was a disaster and I really didn’t want to repeat the experience.
You could say I was self-taught about gay sex, through several awkward sexual moments I began to learn how to suck cock, eat ass (being clean), 69, and sexual positions for fucking, yes I’m a top. I quickly learned that most gay men in New Orleans are shellfish when it comes to sex, and most have no imagination.
At 27 I learned that the gay community in New Orleans (applied to other cities as well) is a cluster-fuck of vain, judgmental, arrogant, narcissistic men. No matter where you went you could hear the talking, shaming, tearing people apart, and the drugs; to me the exclusion of young men because they didn’t fit this perceived mold of what it means to be a gay man was the most shameful. It was at this point I decided to go back into “the closet.” I’ve never really had “preferences” when it comes to sexual partners, just be honest and upfront with what you want and my only requirement is being clean (your ass and body).
I’m 34 now and still in the closet!
I have no regrets about the choice I’ve made. Some would say it’s about me being embarrassed about who I am. So, let me clear this misconception up; I know who I am as a person, and being gay doesn’t define me as a person. I really don’t have a problem not telling anyone I’m gay, I just don’t feel the need to scream it from the rooftops.
Some would say I’m missing out on the experience of being around people who are like myself. From my perspective, I’m not missing a thing. I have an active sex life with no complaints and who cares when fucking if you’re in the closet? Is that a question you ask when hooking up a guy? I don’t recall seeing “I’m out” on hook-up (social) apps. I’ve never asked someone if they are out and don’t intend to start now, to be honest, it’s none of my business and it shouldn’t be yours as well.
Men of all ages have different reasons for not coming out, and who gives anyone the right to force or shame someone for not coming out? Do we really accept everyone for who they are or just those that conform to those perceived standards? I’ve seen men destroyed by other gays simply for being different or trying to be themselves. Whether or not you are out doesn’t define e as a man nor does it diminish my masculinity
Until the gay culture learns to truly accept everyone as they are we are nothing more than a hypocritical, petty community just waiting to destroy or judge someone.
The following article is a personal opinion and does not reflect the opinion of Squirrel News, it's employee's or any third-party.
Xu Jingsen also known as ASam has become China’s first openly gay athlete and he will be the first-ever Gay Games Ambassador from China. Jingsen came out on his Weibo page. His message was translated by the Federation of Gay Games and OutSports passed it on. Xu Jingsen wrote:
“I am ASam. I will attend the global Gay Games in Paris, France, in August this year and serve as an ambassador.
Life is human, the ultimate measure of our inner courage. Yes, I am gay. We have the right to choose love and to be loved. Sex, age and skin color are not shackles. We are all the same, living in the sun.
Today, I am brave to be my most true self, and I see it as the greatest gift I have ever given. If my bravery brings comfort to those who feel lonely, and encourages them to support equality, then everything I do will be more meaningful.”
Weibo is the Facebook of China and in recent years has been condemned for banning LGBTQ-related content, but after the protest, it rescinded that policy
While homosexuality is legal in China there are few to no protections for LGBT citizens, and studies show that only 5% of Chinese LGBT people are out.
Although the Gay Games doesn’t have a surfing event, Jingsen will compete in swimming and basketball. We wish Jingsen all the best and can’t wait to see how he does at the Paris games and the 2022 Gay Games, which will be held in Hong Kong.
A Belgian neurologist in a new study has found that the brain activity in transgender people is similar to that of cisgender people, more of their gender than their assigned sex at birth. Julie Bakker the led research at the University of Liege which included more than 160 MRI scans of transgender people who were diagnosed with gender dysphoria; the study involved children and teenagers. The study also included measuring brain microstructures using diffusion tensor imaging.
The scans were then compared to individuals of comparable age who were not diagnosed with gender dysphoria. The study did find that transgender boys’ brain activity resembled cisgender boys’ and girls’ resembled cisgender girls’. It is believed that the technique could be used to assist transgender children at an earlier age.
“Although more research is needed, we now have evidence that sexual differentiation of the brain differs in young people with GD, as they show functional brain characteristics that are typical of their desired gender,” said Bakker. Furthermore, she stated: “We will then be better equipped to support these young people, instead of just sending them to a psychiatrist and hoping that their distress will disappear spontaneously.”
The results of the study were presented at the European Society of Endocrinology’s yearly meeting and appear to be in line with previous neurological studies that showed transgender adults appear to have similar brain structures to cisgender people of their gender.
The grim facts about bullying and the long-term effects on our children.
60% of middle school students say that they have been bullied, while 16% of staff believes that students are bullied.
160,000 students stay home from school every day due to bullying. (NEA)
30% of students who reported they had been bullied said they had at times brought weapons to school.
A bully is 6 times more likely to be incarcerated by the age of 24.
A bully is 5 times more likely to have a serious criminal record when he grows up.
2/3 of students who are targets become bullies.
20% of all children say they have been bullied.
20% of high school students say they have seriously considered suicide within the last 12 months.
25% of students say that teachers intervened in bullying incidents while 71% of teachers say they intervened.
The average child has watched 8,000 televised murders and 100,000 acts of violence before finishing elementary school.
In schools where there are anti-bullying programs, bullying is reduced by 50%.
Bullying was a factor in 2/3 of the 37 school shootings reviewed by the US Secret Service.
According to the National Institute of Occupational Safety Health (NIOSH) (Sauter, et al.,1990), there is a loss of employment amounting to $19 billion and a drop-in productivity of $3 billion due to workplace bullying.
Law enforcement costs related to bullying are enormous. Since 1999, the Office on Violence against Women (OVW) has spent $98 million in assistance to address campus sexual violence.
United States Dept. of Health and Human Services. Office of Statistic and Reporting. Risks & Effects of Bullying in the United States and the Education System. 2017.
I remember the first time I saw Connie Hung it was at the New Orleans Pride annual Mr. & Ms. New Orleans Pride competition. To be honest, I’d never heard of her, nor had I ever seen her perform, but it was a performance I couldn’t forget.
Connie is a native of Southeast Louisiana and grew up in Avondale. For her growing up would prove to be difficult and challenging since she comes from a traditional Vietnamese family. If you know anything about Asia families you understand the high expectations they place on their children. Ms. Hung knew she was gay since the 8th grade and had a crush on a boy in her class, however, wouldn’t tell her parents out of fear of disappointing them. “My relationship with my parents was strained, I would see them, but they would speak to me,” she stated.
I would be 9 years before her parents would finally accept her life, “I had to give them space, and respect that space.” Furthermore, “I felt that I was a failure and that I had disappointed them,” she says. It wasn’t until she was in the hospital for a serious illness that Connie told her parents about doing drag, and for some reason, it didn’t seem important to them, but maybe the health of their son was more important.
Ms. Hung has been doing drag for 7 years now and the one impression I get is that she is a perfectionist and will never settle for anything less than perfection. She freely opens up about performing, and the insecurities she has. It’s this drive to perfection that has, in my opinion, made her very popular and enjoyable to watch. For example, at the Pride pageant, she performed Disney’s Mulan and it really was impressive. Her ability to reach an audience is perfection, it’s no wonder she won (all the performers were exceptional).
It was the Pride event that Connie emerged to the forefront of having a platform. Anti-bullying is something she thinks is important, “I was heavy in high school, picked on because I was gay and this made me angry,” she says. She remembers the pain it caused her and wants young individuals to stand up for themselves, be strong and proud of who they are. “I want to surround myself with people who are positive and supportive not negative,” and “I’m willing to help anyone that asks, and help them achieve their goals.” If you ask her about drag she admits that if you’re going to do drag do your best, and be good at it.
Regardless how you feel about drag, you have to admire the hard work it takes to completely change and put yourself out there. Connie Hung makes her mark by being herself, true to her aesthetics as a performer. I’ll end this with her own words “I’m an open book, what you see is that you get, there’s nothing shocking to tell you.”
If you haven’t heard of Aaron Schlossberg here’s your chance. The Trump-loving, racist lawyer from New York was caught on tape just melting down and all because two people spoke Spanish in his presence at a Manhattan eatery.
The video that has gone viral this week shows Schlossberg threating to call Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) and have people “kicked out of my country” then telling a restaurant employee that “it’s America” and that the “staff should be speaking English.”
Schlossberg who is public enemy #1 has been reported to the disciplinary committee (New York Bar), kicked out of his office space and to top it all off there is now a fundraising campaign to send a mariachi band outside of his building, and lastly, his Yelp page has been overrun with negative reviews.
But it’s the memes that are hilarious, just check out the Aaron Schlossberg memes. ENJOY!
Officers Thomas Murphy and Andrew Huber have been accused of creating a hostile work environment in which five officers and one employee from Mountainside, New Jersey and claiming years of abuse from two officers while the department did nothing to intercede or stop it. The claim there has been a “hostile work environment” that to some sound a lot like bullying.
One of the accusation state that the officers would hit their colleagues in the head with a dildo they nicknamed “Big Blue.” One of the plaintiff’s name Stinner who was assigned to the Detective Bureau was subjected to “Big Blue” almost every day. “Huber would wave around Big Blue, throw it within the Detective Bureau, and throw it at people walking past the Detective Bureau,” Stinner stated.
The complaint alleges that Huber put “Big Blue” in the face of a male dispatcher then hit him over the head. Murphy would laugh then comment, ‘Get him,’ ‘What’s it smell like,’ and ‘I hope it doesn’t smell like what I think it smells like.’”
It appears the two didn’t stop there, according to the complaint “Murphy had a practice of taking his flashlight and ramming it into the anus area of other male officers.” Furthermore, “On one occasion, Murphy hit Plaintiff Urban with the flashlight so hard that it hurt for Urban to sit down,”
Within the department “braining” would become known as another form of harassment. “This is a reference to Huber taking his testicles out of his pants and placing his testicles on someone’s food, drink or person,” the complaint reads. “Either Huber or Murphy would take a picture of [the other] ‘braining’ an item without the target officer’s knowledge.”
Huber had a habit of hiding in the bathroom hoping to surprise another male officer who would try to use the same toilet. And Murphy would swing a bag of donuts near male genitals, taunting the male dispatcher and simulate masturbating as stated in the complaint.
Since then both Murphy and Huber have been placed on an administrative leave of absence, and only after higher-ups learned of the lawsuit.
The borough has placed on its website the following statement:
“In light of these new allegations and in the interests of avoiding the occasion for friction and discord in the Police Department the Governing Body has determined to place Officers Murphy and Huber on an Administrative Leave of Absence. Such action is not in any way designed to lend any credence to any of the allegations made in the Complaint. The Borough will continue the process of conducting a thorough investigation of all the allegations in the Complaint.”
We’ll have wait and see what happens next!
Jordan Pavloviki requested an Uber last Wednesday. He stated “I noticed that the Uber driver kept looking back at me in his rear-view mirror, but I didn’t think much of it at the time.” After pulling up to his home in Perth, he says the driver parked in his driveway, “After dropping me off, I was about to get out the car and the driver stopped me and asked me what my name was, to confirm that I was the one who had request the Uber,” he says.
He reported that he thought it was strange the driver “stayed parked in my driveway and stared at me, I thought it was quite weird.” However, once inside of his house Pavlovski noticed a text message from the driver it read “If you like giving blow jobs,” and included the driver’s cell phone number.
“I couldn’t believe what I was seeing,” he says. “It just made me feel violated and gross. The whole thing was really creepy. The worst part is that he knows where I live now, which makes me feel really uncomfortable.” Pavlovski said.
Upon contacting Uber, they stated they were investigating the matter and has since released a statement: “Under no circumstances should an [Uber] partner behave or treat you in a way that you feel unsafe or uncomfortable,” the company told him. “Uber is committed to safety connecting riders and partners, and we take reports like this seriously.”
Pavlovski doesn’t understand how the driver thought he could get away with this behavior.
“I am openly gay, but that should never be an invitation,” Pavlovski says. “There is a bit of stigma around sexual harassment and abuse towards men. I sometimes feel like it’s not taken as seriously. I’m OK and I can deal with it, but I know for a lot of people, this kind of thing would have a huge impact.”
After publishing an assumed interview with the secret male lover of a closeted bisexual Premier League soccer star, the sun is under heavy fire. Racheal Dale a reporter for The Sun never identified the name of the player has a child by his long-term female partner, but allegedly has a gay lover on the side who he met at a nightclub and see’s often for sex.
“The Sun knows the identity of the footballer but has chosen not to reveal his name,” Dale stated. The homophobic includes salacious quotes from the man’s supportive lover. This has many calling the story “sensationalist” and “insidious” and calls to boycott the tabloid.
The Mersey Marauders Football Club, a gay team in Liverpool has accused the tabloid of “peddling their homophobic agenda again” and “trying to make headlines about ‘closeted; gay football players having ‘affairs’.”
Ryan Atkin and Premier League referee who came out last year expressed his disapproval “Publishing the story with the underlying theme of a potential sex scandal is just another low blow, whether they print the name or not,” he tells Indy100. “It’s that typical ‘we know who you are’ statement, which is insidious.” Furthermore; “The more people that come out, the easier it becomes for others. But speculation around the sexual orientation of professional footballers is one thing we really need to stop.”
24-year old Michael Troina a former firefighter from Queens has claimed that was told to “have sex with a stripper” to prove he isn’t gay, he has since filed a federal discrimination lawsuit against the FDNY.
Torina was a member of Ladder Co 1/Engine Co 7 and was subjected to “hazing rituals” which included homophobic and racist abuse, to stomping on his bunker gear, putting peanut butter on his car and taking his face and superimposing it on a crying baby.
Nine firefighters, three lieutenants, two chiefs, Daniel Nigro (Fire Commissioner) and the city of New York as defendants. In the lawsuit, Troina stated that he “was singled out time and time again on account of his race and national origin as a Hispanic American male as well as perceived homosexuality” Furthermore, was “threatened with physical violence if he dared to report any incident of battery, harassment or discrimination to the FDNY’s Equal Employment Opportunity Office.”
The worst and most disturbing is the claim that Troina colleagues “tried to coerce” him to “have sex with a stripper” just to prove he wasn’t a homosexual. Troina refused and was called a “faggot”, a “closet homo” and a “closet homo”, as alleged in the suit. He also recalls an account when he was excluded from a firehouse volleyball outing, and was told his colleagues described him with homophobic insults.
Another time he saw another firefighter doing an impression of him, when he reported this incident to his supervisor, he was told it was done “in good fun and to not take it too hard.”
In the suit is claiming that Troina suffered “mental and emotional stress” and endured “constant discrimination and ridicule, the lawsuit seeks unspecified damages.